developmental milestone query???

Hi, I found this site with my browser and am quite pleased I did...it's packed with helpful stuff!!!!

Anyway, here's my 'problem'. I have three children, one aged 10, one aged 8 and one of 10 months. I've never been one to compare my children's developmental milestones to others children, but I'm having some issues with my youngest and wondered if anyone could shed some encouraging light my way.

He's a clever lad, was sitting unaided at five months, crawling at eight months and seems only a week or so away from taking his first steps. He loves to try and names things and shapes are his favourite - he watches my mouth intently as I speak and although his vocabulary is mainly limited to 'adah, adoh, mama, baba etc' you can tell he loves the idea of being able to communicate.

The thing is, he has never pointed at anything, never passed me anything - like his cup or a toy - and has little interest in playing with shape-sorting toys (the type where you put certain shapes into corresponding holes). I know it's wrong to compare, but his little friend, who is only two weeks older than him, is constantly passing me things, offering me his cup and happily enjoys putting things in and out of stuff....am I just being paranoid?

Re: developmental milestone query???

Hi Loz, I love this site too! I'm always on here, you'll soon notice if you keep on coming *lol*

Comparing our children's development is something we know we shouldn't do but we all do it, I'm sure - well I do anyway!

The thing to remember is that every child is different and likes doing different things, even if they are siblings. My oldest and middle girls (9 and 6) loved books and were always trying to read but my youngest, although I'm sure she's just as bright, isn't that bothered with books and would rather play. My eldest and my youngest loved those block shape toys and sorting them into the right holes but my middle one wouldn't go near them and preferred to find the hole that was big enough for all the blocks and use that for all the shapes *lol* Makes you wonder who was the smartest one there, doesn't it?

It sounds like your little one is doing fine, he is mobile, communicating with you and active. I wouldn't be worried if he was mine. He's probably just assertive - when you want his cup, he's probably thinking "No! She's not having my drink!" *lol* I know I would. It's like when people try to get their kids to repeat doing something cute for other people. I always think the child (my own included) is thinking "I'm not a performing seal!" :o)

Don't sweat the small stuff. It will make you stinky.

Re: developmental milestone query???

hi, Nina...have seen that youre a regular on here....will probably be seeing alot of you, lol. Thanks for your reply. I know that I am probably worrying without cause...but you just cant help it. Others toddlers are handing you things, pointing at things they want, whilst yours is just sitting there, whinging until you pass it to him......

The thing is,  know he's assertive....which is probably why he doesnt feel the need to point and 'ask' for something, since he simply decides to go and get it for himself, and as for sharing his stuff and giving things to others, i suppose you could be right - he knows they are his, so in his mind he thinks, why should i give them away, only for them to hand it back to me!Babies huh? No matter how many you have, each one is completely different.

Re: developmental milestone query???

hey Nina is rite! they all have their own way of doing things my girls love to do everything and are fast at everything but some babies just take a bit longer to do things, just keep persisting with him and asing him to giv you things or give him something then put your hand out and say ta but everytime you give him something say ta so he knows when he gets it he says thank you my girls loved doing that, thats how i got them to start passing things about. hope that helps xXx

Tell those closest to you that you love them as you never know when they might be gone!

Re: developmental milestone query???

I pop now and again on here too, it is a good site, yes, they are all different, and thats a positive thing, I have three, a girl and two boys, all totally different personalities and tempers too!...my youngest is 14 months and has only just started to bring me things, but its to swap, for example, if I have a chocolate bisciut, he will give me his plain biscuit, and point at mine, so I swap, it's cute, they flourish at their own pace, bye for now    x

Re: developmental milestone query???

Good to see you on again Loz - we need some more regulars. I haven't been on for a while because the website just hasn't been working for me, but I'm back now! Let's hope Goodtoknow can keep up with us!

I was just thinking reading this thread that it's not just likes, dislikes and development - it could be confidence too. When we went on holiday to India a few years ago, we lost my middle daughter (who was 2 at the time) at the airport. THANK GOD she was only gone for a couple of minutes before my hubby found her, but it was heart stopping for us and ever since she has really lacked the confidence the other two have and you can tell she gets stressed when there are big crowds about. She also had a slight speech problem when she was younger and doesn't talk as much as the other two. We didn't correct her and the school said she would grow out of it (they were right) but other kids sometimes made fun of her and so it was almost as though she stopped trying.

It's sad but I think we forget that experiences mean a lot to children and they affect them a lot. I'll never forget those minutes when we lost Simie at the crowded airport, it makes me anxious just thinking about it - so what affect did it have on her?

Don't sweat the small stuff. It will make you stinky.