RE: my sons behaviour

RE: my sons behaviour

My son is 3 years old and he is not talking and cant behave for more than 5 minutes if we are lucky he is always lashing out at his brother. Shouts back at his dad and me and also hits me . I am worried about him but my health vistor wont help at all we have been telling her our concerns for the last 18 months and still nothing.He started nursery and they have said that they have concerns as well and they have also said that if he dont get the help that is needed that he wont be able to go into normal school .  Is there anyone on here that can help with some words of advice.

many thanks

Re: RE: my sons behaviour In reply to: sarahb77

forst things first, if your son is in a good nursery they should be able to coach you and give you advice on how to controll him, if not then its not a very good nursery! does your son have anything big going on @ home? have you moved house, changed nursery, someone left home? It sounds to me as though he is lashing out because of some kind of trauma in his life, remember what might seem like a small change to you might be a HUGE change to your son. try taking him places you know he loves going or take him to see people you know he loves to see and do it as often as possible he might come out of his shell for that and enjoy himself. when he misbehaves you cant let him away with it, when he throws a wobly hold him as tight as you can and cuddle him till he cant hit you anymore, do that everytime he starts then tell him you love him and it hurts mummy when he is being like that, he doesnt mean to hurt you, but its the only way he can air how he is feeling.

i hope i have been a help to you.

Nykita xXx

Re: RE: my sons behaviour In reply to: sarahb77

I would bypass the health visitor and go to your GP instead they are more in the know. Take your partner with you as support. Your doctor should point you in the right direction. To me i dont think its general temper tantrums. If he's not speaking it could be that he's frustrated because he's finding it difficult to communicate with you. An Educational Psychologist could be the answer. They can asses your son for his speach, behaviour, social skills and a whole load of other thing and will be able to tell you why he's behaving like he is. Hope this helps.

Edited about 1 year ago

Re: RE: my sons behaviour In reply to: sarahb77

Hi, as a parent you have a sixth sense when it comes to behaviour that is outside "the norm".  I knew there were issues with my sons behaviour before he started Nursery, and once he did start, my suspicions were confirmed.  I went to my GP (my son was about 3 1/2 and had been at Nursary for a few months) I was referred to the child psychologist at the local hospital. I then began on a long and tiring road, where sometimes I felt that no-one was listening to me and perhaps I was imagining the extremity of his problems (even though I knew I wasn't).  It was an uphill struggle, every step of the way, and the only thing that kept me going was to see my son able to cope with everyday situations.           ;           &nb sp;           & nbsp;     I changed his whole diet (removed the artificial additives, colours etc) stopped any fizzy drinks and encouraged him to drink water or pure orange/apple.

He received a statement (of educational needs) when he was about 6 which gave him 15 hours support a week and in less than a year this was increased to 20 hours when at the review it was noted that not only was his behaviour not improving - it was steadily becoming worse.  what was worrying me more was the fact that he had made no progress academically in almost 2 years.

He is 9 now and has been at an EBD school (Emotional Behaviour Development) since November '07 and we are finally beginning to see a positive change in his behaviour.  He just could not cope with mainstream school as this seemed to accentuate his frustrations and behaviour.  He has recently started taking Omega 3 capsules and I do think these are making a difference, at least to his concentration etc.  Also as he is getting older, he is maturing.  Where he once would lash out at anything or anyone - most of the time he is able to work through these times and calm himself down (sometimes he does need a bit of help).

Your situation may be different but what I am saying is persevere, shout until you are heard and accept all help that is offered - the rewards are immeasurable as you start to see the difference in your childs behaviour that the right kind of help can make.

Re: RE: my sons behaviour In reply to: sarahb77

Hi, as a parent you have a sixth sense when it comes to behaviour that is outside "the norm".  I knew there were issues with my sons behaviour before he started Nursery, and once he did start, my suspicions were confirmed.  I went to my GP (my son was about 3 1/2 and had been at Nursary for a few months) I was referred to the child psychologist at the local hospital. I then began on a long and tiring road, where sometimes I felt that no-one was listening to me and perhaps I was imagining the extremity of his problems (even though I knew I wasn't).  It was an uphill struggle, every step of the way, and the only thing that kept me going was to see my son able to cope with everyday situations.           ;           &nb sp;           & nbsp;     I changed his whole diet (removed the artificial additives, colours etc) stopped any fizzy drinks and encouraged him to drink water or pure orange/apple.

He received a statement (of educational needs) when he was about 6 which gave him 15 hours support a week and in less than a year this was increased to 20 hours when at the review it was noted that not only was his behaviour not improving - it was steadily becoming worse.  what was worrying me more was the fact that he had made no progress academically in almost 2 years.

He is 9 now and has been at an EBD school (Emotional Behaviour Development) since November '07 and we are finally beginning to see a positive change in his behaviour.  He just could not cope with mainstream school as this seemed to accentuate his frustrations and behaviour.  He has recently started taking Omega 3 capsules and I do think these are making a difference, at least to his concentration etc.  Also as he is getting older, he is maturing.  Where he once would lash out at anything or anyone - most of the time he is able to work through these times and calm himself down (sometimes he does need a bit of help).

Your situation may be different but what I am saying is persevere, shout until you are heard and accept all help that is offered - the rewards are immeasurable as you start to see the difference in your childs behaviour that the right kind of help can make.

Re: RE: my sons behaviour In reply to: sarahb77

Hi, as a parent you have a sixth sense when it comes to behaviour that is outside "the norm".  I knew there were issues with my sons behaviour before he started Nursery, and once he did start, my suspicions were confirmed.  I went to my GP (my son was about 3 1/2 and had been at Nursary for a few months) I was referred to the child psychologist at the local hospital. I then began on a long and tiring road, where sometimes I felt that no-one was listening to me and perhaps I was imagining the extremity of his problems (even though I knew I wasn't).  It was an uphill struggle, every step of the way, and the only thing that kept me going was to see my son able to cope with everyday situations.           ;           &nb sp;           & nbsp;     I changed his whole diet (removed the artificial additives, colours etc) stopped any fizzy drinks and encouraged him to drink water or pure orange/apple.

He received a statement (of educational needs) when he was about 6 which gave him 15 hours support a week and in less than a year this was increased to 20 hours when at the review it was noted that not only was his behaviour not improving - it was steadily becoming worse.  what was worrying me more was the fact that he had made no progress academically in almost 2 years.

He is 9 now and has been at an EBD school (Emotional Behaviour Development) since November '07 and we are finally beginning to see a positive change in his behaviour.  He just could not cope with mainstream school as this seemed to accentuate his frustrations and behaviour.  He has recently started taking Omega 3 capsules and I do think these are making a difference, at least to his concentration etc.  Also as he is getting older, he is maturing.  Where he once would lash out at anything or anyone - most of the time he is able to work through these times and calm himself down (sometimes he does need a bit of help).

Your situation may be different but what I am saying is persevere, shout until you are heard and accept all help that is offered - the rewards are immeasurable as you start to see the difference in your childs behaviour that the right kind of help can make.