Spoilt? Or Attention Seeking?? PLEASE HELP!

Spoilt? Or Attention Seeking?? PLEASE HELP!

I am the older sister of a moody little 9 year old boy. It sounds like I'm just going to complain, but mum has asked me to research what could be wrong with him.

He's a bright lad, tall, cute,has loads of friends, and always gets good reports from school. Recently my parents split and we both live with our mum, but we see dad very frequently. When we're at dad's he's polite, and nice to be with, and he talks to you like your a real person. When we're both at home (at mum's) he's a moody little...thing. If he doesn't get what he wants he kicks off...literally; he throws things, hits people, hits himself, screams, crys, shouts, makes himself sick, breaks things, draws everywhere..and yeah basically.

We just can't control him. He swears at me all the time and hits everyone. We really don't know what to do. The thing is though, mum is actually scared of him now. If he asks for something and she says no, he'll just..kick off, like I explained before. Sometimes worse than others. I think I know what at least one reason could be; mum has been with her boyfriend for over a year now, and he's started to stay over more than he used to. So maybe that's why he's kicking up about stuff.

Has anyone got any ideas of how to control him?? We really need help..quickly!!!

Re: Spoilt? Or Attention Seeking?? PLEASE HELP! In reply to: !Rachy!!!Babes!

Parents splitting up and new partners on the scene is a confusing time for a child of any age. It takes some kids longer to adjust to situations than others. They have to work out where they belong again within the family setup. Your brother kicking off in my view is him trying to tell his family (hey well actualy i'm not ok, i'm not dealing with the whole change thing very well at all) Also kids are constantly pushing boundries, it could be that he realises that if he kicks off enough he'll get what he wants. My advice would be for your mum or dad or both, to sit down with him and say... yes there has been alot of changes in our lives recently, None of which have been your fault, mum and dad still love you the same as they always have. Reasure him that if there is anything troubling him he can talk to you. But make it clear to him that his behaviour when he kicks off is not acceptable. When he does kick off, don't give him what he wants otherwise this will only continue because its working for him. He's probably too old for 'Time out' but try it, or take away privalages such as  no playstation or computer until he calms down and appologises for his behaviour. My kids have been through parents split and new boyfriend thing, and i'v tried to be honest with them about whats happening, after all its their lives too that are affected and i always reasure them they are loved, its not their fault and they can talk to me about anything. So far this has seemed to work for me but only time will tell.    Hope some of this helps and let us know how things go.

Edited about 1 year ago

Re: Spoilt? Or Attention Seeking?? PLEASE HELP! In reply to: looby

Hey thanks for the advice, I really do hope it works,as I said he really is uncontrolable most of the time. One question though..Do you belibe the things kids eat do have an affect on them? Like hyperactivity or being really angry etc?? Maybe that's not helping.

Thankyou for your help =]

xoxox

Re: Spoilt? Or Attention Seeking?? PLEASE HELP! In reply to: !Rachy!!!Babes!

yes i do believe food stuffs do have a impact on kids behaviour. These days most foods are crammed full of preservetives and addatives, sweeteners ets. Cola, smarties, and other high sugar, high colourant .high addative things send mine and my friends two kids bouncing of the ceiling. Try to keep food simple and healthy, not too many ,what i call treat foods.