Kids and Bedtimes

Kids and Bedtimes

So what time does everyone put their kids to bed? I know it depends on the child and routines but I'm never sure if I'm doing the right thing or not.

My 4 year old goes to bed at half seven, my 6 year old at eight and my 9 year old at nine o'clock (but on Wednesdays she goes at ten because she likes to watch The Apprentice).

We have a routine that after school the girls do their homework and then either play or go to Punjabi classes (Mon and Tues evening). Then they have tea and we start winding down (i.e. baths, stories and watching some TV). Then they'll go to bed happily enough and sleep right through till about half seven.

The only thing that niggles me is when I speak to other people with kids of similar ages, they seem to put their kids to bed a lot earlier than me?

What does everyone else think?

Re: Kids and Bedtimes In reply to: Nina

I have 2 children - girl of 11 who goes to bed around 8.30pm on a school night and 10pm on a holiday and weekends - she complains about this time because all her friends stay up till 9pm - but my arguement back is that she gets up every morning at 7am - whethers its a school day or weekend - it she goes to bed later on a night she still gets up at the same time and look like death.

 My son who is 5 (going on 50) goes to bed between 7.30 to 8pm and gets up at 7am on a school day but at the weekends he stays in bed till around 8.30am so he gets plenty of sleep to keep him going all day.

I think it is up to the parents to set the bed routine as some girls in my daughters class start feeling sleepy at around lunch time (these are the one that are still watching tv at 10.-10.30 on a school night).

Don't beat your self up about the bed times - as long as your kids are getting enough sleep, healthy, happy and doing well at school - I think that is all that matters.

This is just my thoughts.

Re: Kids and Bedtimes In reply to: hobo

well now! lol my eldest Hope she is 3 in july and she goes to bed round about 8pm unless its nice outside then we all go out and play till round about 9 half 9 to tire her out as she does not sleep through the night and my youngest Faith is 1 and she goes to sleep round about half 9, we have trouble getting her to go to sleep! Both girls seem to have never ending energy which im sure they drain from me as im always tired lol If Hope does not fall asleep during the day she will go to sleep round about half 7 and sleep till about half 5, 6 o clock then goes back to sleep till about 8ish lol Faith usually sleeps through but sometimes she gets up through the night if she is teathing or is not well.  Hope starts at her new nursery in the mornings so she will be goig to bed at about 8pm and up at about 7am to get washed and have breakfast before starting nursery at 9am.  I hope i can get my girls into a good routine as they reallyneed itinfact I really need it lol.

Re: Kids and Bedtimes In reply to: Nykita

That makes me feel a lot better, thanks for that. I just feel like a bad mother some mornings at the school when other mums talk about putting their kids to bed early or how they hoover their carpets about 3 times a day (we're lucky if our carpets get hoovered 3 times a week!).

I suppose us women are just too competitive *lol* I'm forever being bombarded with stories about how they all cook everything from scratch and wash every single items of clothing every time it's taken off and do wash their bed linen at least twice a week.

Perhaps I just have lower standards to everyone else? I don't want to put on 5 machine loads of washing every day and spend all my time cooking and cleaning?! We eat well most of the time, my house isn't dirty, just a bit untidy. I work full time, my husband works full time and I'd rather let some things slide and spend time together as a family.

I think I should stop worrying and also stop listening to all these women at the school!

Re: Kids and Bedtimes In reply to: Nina

lol i try to hoover at least once a day and my house is pretty much always a mess (not dirty though).  My mum is a neat freak and thinks all washing and dishes should all be up to date and the house should be spotless!! so i try and clean it up before she comes over but it will never be as clean as she has her house.  The kids arent allowed to touch anything in her house really sept their toys! shes way too strict!! im lucky if i get to polish once a week and we always have dirty dishes sitting for at least a few hours.  What do people expect us to do! im a full time mother and runnin round after 2 kids a dog and a cat (not to mention my husband) is not easy as none of them will tidy up after themselves! I try to get my husband to tidy up after himself but he never does! I dont like having an untidy house but id rather not stress myself and the kids out byt chasing them and picking their toys up as they pull them out.  But as for the other mothers saying they hoover 3 times a day and wash all dirty clothes as soon as they come off! what a load of rubbish! they probably run round at last minute cleaning everything before they get guests lol.  Talking of house work i have tonnes to do and a bathroom full of wasing to get done lol so id better be off!

Re: Kids and Bedtimes In reply to: Nina

Don't listen to the mums in the playground - as the last person says they probably don't do half the things they say.   I am also a full time mum - I don't have time to vac 3 times a day and I certainly don't wash every day - even with 4 of us in the house.

My house is clean and tidy when the kids aren't in but then looks like a bombs hit it as soon as the kids arrive home from school.

Be realistic - as long as you and your family are happy, healthy and spend time together thats all that matters - whats wrong with a bit of a mess - I think a house should look lived in not a show house for people to look at.

When guest come to my house they may find toys everywhere - but I know its clean - and if the guests don't like it they don't need to come again.    A true friend is one that comes to see you not your house!!!!!!.

It sounds like you are doing a great job looking after your family and working (I know how hard it can be as only became a full time mum at christmas so know how hard it can be to juggle everything).   Keep up the good work!!!!

Re: Kids and Bedtimes In reply to: hobo

Thank you - you're all very kind. It never occured to me that those women might not be telling the truth - I'm so gullible! And you're right, anyone who doesn't like a bit of mess in your house doesn't have to come again!

This'll make you laugh, yesterday morning, one of the mums was going on about how she never gives her kids sweets or any processed food at all (WHAT they eat, I don't know *lol*), and she hated fish fingers most of all.

This was the moment that my 4 year old came out with "I had fish fingers for tea! I loooooooove fish fingers, yummy!" I wish kids came with a remote control!

Keep Smiling and Eat Well :o)

Re: Kids and Bedtimes In reply to: Nina

Hi I have an 11 yr old girl and a 6yr old boy and even tho i try to get my son into bed by 8 its always closer to nine , he dosent seem to need that much sleep ,he gets up at half seven for school wide awake and raring to go.

my daughter on the other hand goes to bed around 9 because if shes up any later shes terrible in the morning and even when she goes to bed at nine she still hates to get up.

I think every individual child needs different amonts of sleep,it just varies.

Also i dont know why but all mums at the school try to compete against each other and im sure half of its not true . The main thing is you know whats right for your individual child.

dont worry were all normal whatever we choose for our children .

hope this helps.    vicky xx

Re: Kids and Bedtimes In reply to: vicky

I think all mums are compedative, i know i am and i don't know why! lol whenever someone tells me "my son/daughter can say such and such" or "my son/daughter can do this that and the next thing", i just have to jump in and say "well Hope or Faith can do this this and this". I don't knw what makes me say it but i feel the need to show off my girls as i am so proud of them! It must be something in the mothering instincts that makes us compete with eachother lol!

All kids are different and they all need different things. Hope only needs to have a cat nap and she is awake all night! But we all tune in to them and give them what they need to be their best!

Re: Kids and Bedtimes In reply to: Nykita

Mums always are competetive it in their nature my little girl is 2 and 2months she goes to bed at 7.30 every night and wakes at about 8.30am ,, i do feel critisized sometimes when other mums say their children of similar ages go to bed at 5.30-6.00 but i think tahats far to early thats dinner time in my opinion but every child varies and needs more or less sleep than the next   i think that what your doing is fine it sounds like they have a structured routine that still enables them to have fun and time to settle down ..x

Re: Kids and Bedtimes In reply to: yummymummy

exactly! every child is different but i too think 5.30-6.00pm is too early, your lucky if were all having tea then lol.  My kiddies have a little freedom to roam around and have fun but with a fairly strict upbringing (but I hope not to strict)

Tell those closest to you that you love them as you never know when they might be gone!

Re: Kids and Bedtimes In reply to: Nykita

This has been a VERY successful thread hasn't it *lol*

I also think before 6pm is too early to put kids to bed (I don't think mine have ever gone to bed that early). But I suppose it depends on routine, like my brother and sister in law used to both commute to work and had to wake up their eldest daughter (they now have 3 kids) at 5:30am. So they put her to bed early.

It's true - every kid is different. I've never joined in with the whole "my kids can do this" thing because, generally, my girls are more advance than other kids their age and it sounds like showing off! I'm not exaggerating, honestly, the reading books for both my eldest girls have always come from classes higher up in the school and sometimes the teachers bring them books in (it's a very good school for that). My youngest seems to be just as bright but she's very head strong (gets it from her dad's side, obviously) and doesn't seem to want to learn as much as her sisters did at the same age, but I'm not fussed really.

I sometimes get asked what I teach my kids at home and the truth is - not a lot really! We've always had lots of books at home and I insist the girls do a bit of reading most days (even in the holidays) and sometimes I buy those activity books for kids of different ages, but that's about it. I have to admit, I had more time for my oldest and now less time for my youngest which I feel bad about, but I suppose everyone's the same? I try to make up for it but it's not always easy with such little time.

My 9 and 6 year old went to the park yesterday without me :o( They went with some other girls from our street and the oldest girl is 12. Very sensible girls, all of them and the park is just one of those little ones round the corner from us, but I did not settle until they got home less than an hour later! My husband came home during his break at work and was telling me not to fret and I should let them go.

I suppose it's hard because I had a very strict upbringing, my parents are immigrants and cannot read or write so coming to a new country must have been very frightening for them. They did a good job and I don't resent my childhood at all - I'm still close to my mum and dad - but I had a very closeted upbringing and was never allowed out anywhere on my own except to school.

I don't think I'll be giving my kids a mobile just yet (hubby's suggestion!), but I will buy my 9 year old a watch so I can say to her "come back by 6" or whatever.

Sorry, went off on a tangent there, but it's sort of related to this thread and I wanted to share!