My boyfriend ended it over a silly arguement

My boyfriend ended it over a silly arguement

Hey guys,

I need some advice, my boyfriend of 6 months finished me recently because he feels theres no spark there between us anymore. when i asked why he feels like this he said its because of the arguments we had literally 4 days previous. Ive asked him if theres anyone else if he fancies anyone else you name it ive asked him and he says the same thing its just the flame.

We argued about his best mate who i dont see why i should speak to because hes never wanted to speak to me before. My bf was quite upset and wanted me to speak to him. It carried on and we was still speaking at the end of it so i didnt think of anything. He then went to see this friend the night after our arguement and he did seem rather moody with me after that and very snappy.

I suggested we tried a week and he eventually agreed but i could tell thats not what he wanted to i said to forget it friends is fine although it isnt. All he seems to do is refer to a barrier thats stopping him from bringing this flame back. Could his friend be this barrier?

My bf still talks to me and he always texts me first which my friend said that he must still like me, but i think its because he wants us as friends and doesnt want to lose contact. He accidently slips by calling me babe, which he used to call me, and whenever he does this you can hear the realisation in his voice and he seems to go quiet and a bit upset before i end the call or ignore what hes said because he may of just slipped. Hes done this a few times on the phone in person and in a text message.

 If anyone could shed some light on this situation it would be really helpful.

 Thanks

Vicki

Re: My boyfriend ended it over a silly arguement

hi im in the same boat as u at the minute me and my boyfriend of 7 months feel out over silly fights that we had for no reason but the main one was him spending so much time at his mate lukes house when i was stuck on his boat all day on my own in the end i said right if that the way its going to be then we may aswell end it now and he said thats not what he wants but maybe its for the best and when i said i didnt mean it he said he cant cope with all the hurt but he does love me but whats confusing me is he hasnt said that he wants his clothes from mine or his truck or the key back from the boat? so im in limbo at the  minute everyone is saying give him time and space to let him calm down and that he still loves me which is a good thing and its not 100 per cent over till he collects all his things

Re: My boyfriend ended it over a silly arguement

Hi Jo,

I'm well sorry to hear it's not going smoothly for you.

Vicki, I'm so sorry. It really sounds like he's made a decision that isn't going to be changed there. It also sounds like he's not giving you the whole story about what it is that's made him take a stand. I know it's a really hurtful situation, but the way I see it, whatever he says - whatever the reason is that he seems unable to spill - just knowing about it isn't going to change it. He really has decided that it's time to call it a day. 

All I can think of is that he still wants your good opinion of him. He still wants to be friends, and he doesn't want to say anything that would really hurt you. I've been in that situation before. It can be that I've had an affair, or because they hate my friends, or I don't feel the person wants the same life as I do, or any number of things that they can't change because it's not their fault, but I don't want to hurt them by saying the real reason because it just feels cruel to someone you do care about.

I hope it gets better and that you focus on taking care of yourself, not just worrying over why and how this sad split has happened.

Re: My boyfriend ended it over a silly arguement

 I'm afraid I agree with Mooksy. Sometimes it's hard for someone to pin point the reason they don;t want to be with someone anymore. It's not that they are being dishonest, it's just that there's nothing concrete they can say that makes it easier for the other person. 

Best thing you can do it try and move on. If you can still be friends with him, then that's great, but don;t do it if it hurts too much. That way he gets everything (ie to still see you - someone he still clearly wants to be friends with) and you get noting. Well, not what you want anyway. 

Good luck with it all!