Encouraging play-fighting

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If you have a son, you need to start play-fighting with him as it will help him grow into a well-adjusted adult. Previous research thought that play-fighting was harmful, but now there is evidence that boys who don't play-fight with their dads or mums can end up being bullied or turn into bullies themselves, because they want to exert themselves. It forces children to confront how they relate to other people. But of course, parents shouldn't be so rough that they actually hurt their kids.
Prof Charlie Lewis, professor of developmental psychology at Lancaster University and father

Father involvement gives good protection against bullying. Kids who are involved with their fathers, and this includes play-fighting, seem to carry a confidence that protects them against bullying and helps them grow up into happier adults.
Jack O'Sullivan, co-founder of Fathers Direct, the National Information Centre on Fatherhood

By Professor Charlie Lewis and Jack O'Sullivan

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Matthew, 6 months

I feel we should do everything we can to ensure children are confident in all the situations they will face in life. Drawing on experience of once being a boy at school my self and of seeing a few scuffles first hand. It seems undeniable that children who lack confidence are more likely to be victimised or bullied. I don't buy into Linda's argument that play fighting leads to violence. If that were true why would we allow self defence to be taught to vulnerable people. Self defence is another form of role play for building confidence. In my experience people who have confidence in themselves, are less likely need to resort to physical intervention to stand up for themselves, as they are less likely to be target and are more likely to take control of the situation.

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linda, 9 months

Ah, so now we have to teach boys to fight? Playfighting is good, according to some "expert". I work with children and know first hand that the last thing we need is encouraging boys to fight. Playfighting leads to real fighting. On the whole 99% of boys do not know when play fighting stops and real fighthing begins. Not to mention that there are plenty of boys out there that have first hand experience of rreal fighting and what its like to be beaten black and blue by dad. So of course here comes this "expert" who now tells us we must teach our boys to fight. Oh wake up world.

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