'Don't take stroppy teens personally!'

difficult teen moody girl sad depression lonley
Average rating: 4 out of 5 star rating
When my eldest daughter Ella reached 13, I went from being her best friend to feeling I had no relationship with her at all. She would come in from school and just grunt at me. It was really heartbreaking as we'd been so close growing up.

I tried talking to her countless times but she acted like I was the most embarrassing person in the world. My partner persuaded me to not get too upset by the way she was treating me. I remembered how much I felt the world was against me when I was that age and decided the best thing to do was just ignore it.

After a while Ella started talking to me again. I think it helped that I didn't show her how upset I was. Now she's 15 and we're much closer again.

I think you have to accept that some relationships are going to go through a rough patch. Teenagers can be very difficult and it's not your fault!
Sara Croxley, 45, Washington, Tyne and Wear

More help and advice

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By Sara Croxley

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Average rating:

4 out of 5 star rating

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  • Iain R, posted 1 year ago

    Note to Sue - I've been in the same situation but my partner supports me which is a tremendous help. You have 2 separate problems - the difficult kid and the lack of support - maybe you could benefit from dealing with them individually. I recommend "Difficult Conversations" by Ann Dickson to help you discuss it with your partner. Dealing with the girl - stay totally calm in the face of any provocation, keep your emotions in check and don't let them show. That immediately takes the wind out of a stressed situation and puts you in control. Get your point across, then walk away from it for a while. I'm guessing her behaviour is probably worse in front of your partner - it's for his benefit - you may get somewhere talking to her individually. It's tough, good luck. Iain.

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  • Sue Jacques, posted 2 years ago

    hi anyone know how to get on with my patners daughter?She is so nasty at times she swears at me and threatens to hit me.He says its me he expects me to let her get away with everything&when i dont im in the wrong,she doesnt speak to him that way,yet he allows her to do it to me.I really love him but its putting a train on our relationship.thanks sue

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  • mary clawson, posted 2 years ago

    im glad i read this ... this is how i feel at the present.... and havin 2 teenage girls... well its hard and i have a 2 yr old, and as a single mum.. i felt like all was falling apart in my world untill i read this...sometimes i wish i could turn the clock back to when they were little and did as they were told... silly i know.... i love them so much ..but its very hard at times

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