Dealing with a fussy eater: Notice me!
Bear in mind that your child very quickly learns that refusing to eat is a great way to get noticed. In fact, if she literally does nothing about food (for example, she just sits and stares at her meal without attempting to lift her cutlery), you'll soon fuss all over her. In this way, fussy eating becomes a powerful way for her to grab your attention. And the more you become agitated by your picky eater's behaviour, the more she realises that this is a really effective strategy for winding you up!
That's why it makes sense to take a calm approach. Don't over-react when she pushes her food around her plate instead of putting it into her mouth. Persuasion is much more effective than coercion; she'll eat when she's ready.
Try not to worry too much about her eating, so long as she gains weight and grows along the expected lines. You'll find paying less attention to her eating habits is a useful long-term strategy.
Five tips for happy mealtimes
- Make mealtimes relaxing: allow plenty of time for your child to finish her meal. Her appetite is better when she's relaxed and comfy.
- Don't take it personally: the fact that she doesn't clear her plate with enthusiasm doesn't mean that she dislikes you. It's important to keep her fussy eating in perspective.
- Smaller portions, larger plates: a small portion of food in the centre of a large plate is less threatening to her than a huge meal piled up on a small plate.
- Sit with your child while she eats: she enjoys your company, and having you beside her means that she doesn't need to misbehave in order to gain your attention.
- Whenever possible, involve your child in the preparation of her meal: this increases her commitment to eating it.
More help and advice
- How to get your toddler to eat more veggies
- 'I panicked when my two-year-old stopped eating!'
- Reward good behaviour
- Try to set boundaries
By goodtoknow
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Christine, 8 months [Offensive? Unsuitable? Report this comment.]
My daughter is having difficulty with her 2 yr old son (she has another boy nearly 1 who eats like a horse) with eating. He was eating a healthy breakfast of home made porridge, banana & toast, a beautifully prepared lunch and tea which were also pleasing to the eye - she's a great cook and has always been given the boys a well balanced diet. Her 2 yr old is now lacking energy and throwing food across the floor - they all sit down together for a family meal when possible and she has tried encouragement and also not reacting at all just taking him down from the table but nothing works. IShe is one of 4 children and though they had their dislikes I never had this problem so don't know what to advise.