First love?
11. They'll probably start to show an interest in the opposite sex now and may have crushes on friends. Be supportive and get to know their girlfriends and boyfriends, don't make fun of a crush or a first love. It will be the first time they will have felt those emotions, so help them through the ups and downs.
12. Explain your values. It's important to talk about your moral or religious values with your child. It can be a talking point for you both to discuss yours and their beliefs.
13. Teach them to respect their bodies. Explain that their body is private and that no-one has the right to touch them or do anything else that they don't want them to do without their permission. Say they must tell you if they feel someone has touched them inappropriately.
14. What about love? Explain that the best setting for sex is in a loving relationship. Talk to them about loving experiences such as getting married and having a baby and the importance of a partner they can love and respect and who loves and respects them.
15. Don't think they're ready? Of course, it's entirely up to you when and how you talk to your child about sex. If you feel unhappy about them learning about sex at school, talk to the teacher. The school can show you the material that your child will be seeing and then you can make your decision. However, remember, it's important that your child understands how their body works in advance of puberty so they won't remember it as a traumatic experience.
16. What if they don't want to talk about sex? Many children feel uncomfortable talking to their parents about sex, so try to start talking to them about it from an early age, that way it won't feel so awkward. You may have to accept that your child doesn't want to talk to you. If that's the case, give them leaflets, helplines and websites ( see below) that they'll find useful.
Get more help from:
- 'My kids' hormones kicked in earlier than expected'
- Are kids growing up too fast?
- 'I used Corrie to help with sex education' - read one mum's story
- Parentline plus - help for parents on bringing up their children. Helpline 0808 800 2222
- The Family Planning Association (fpa) has lots of helpful leaflets and advice. Helpline 0845 122 8690
- DirectGov - parenting website
- ChildLine - the charity helpline for children and young people. Your child can call free on 0800 1111 to talk about any problem with a counsellor.
- Like It Is - a great website for youngsters from family planning specialists, Marie Stopes. Advice and help on everything from puberty worries to contraception and pregnancy scares
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