12 tips for keeping your kids safe on social media

Kids know so much about phones, tablets and computers these days, but you can teach them a thing or two about staying safe online with our helpful guide

parent monitoring kids' device usage
(Image credit: Getty Images)

We've pulled together an internet safety guide with 12 tips for keeping your kids safe on social media for parents who are concerned about what their child might be exposed to online.

The internet can be a scary place for parents. Reports show can take just 10 minutes for a child to access unsafe content, and apps such as Paw Patrol is one of the 10 most popular kids' apps that are 'spying' on users it's never been as important to teach children about staying safe online.

Social media use has grown exponentially over the past few years, with recent statistics showing that 'sending private messages' was the second most common activity of social media users in 2023. Research has found that 97 per cent of children as young as 12 are now using social media for an average of 3.65 hours a day and almost 90 per cent of young people believe that social media is driving harmful behaviour, but this doesn’t stop millions of youngsters from accessing the content regularly.

In a survey conducted at the end of last year by YoungMinds, it was reported that 34 per cent of young people wanted to leave social media weekly but felt unable to do so, while more than a fifth (22 per cent) are shown distressing content, based on their browsing history, at least once a week

Meanwhile, The Royal Society for Public Health found that using Snapchat, Facebook, Twitter and Instagram led to increased feelings of depression, anxiety, poor body image and loneliness among 14-24-year-olds. 

Serena Hadi, head of operations and practice at Cornerstone VR, part of the Antser Group, which created four virtual reality (VR) films to help explore the online dangers kids face, said: “It’s no secret that social media is now an inescapable presence in the everyday lives of so many of us, especially among young people. It yields huge power and there are many people using their influence online to target vulnerable children and young people. When we started doing our research, we were really surprised by the methods that these individuals were using.”

She continued, “Our new VR content is so important right now because it highlights the impact social media can have on both the physical and mental wellbeing and safety of children and young people. It was really important to us not to retread on old ground. We wanted to make the films as realistic and informative as possible to highlight the things that we don’t always see as adults.”

Serena Hadi
Serena Hadi

As Head of Operations and Practice, Serena is committed to improving outcomes for children in and touched by the care system. With more than 10 years of experience in managing teams within children’s services, Serena is also Social Work England registered. Throughout her career, she has engaged with multiple and varied stakeholders and quality assured a range of services.

The Government's recent Online Safety Act, compelled tech firms to protect their users - especially young users - from harm and has since considered curbing the use of social media by those under the age of 16. Parminder Basra, director of operations at Inspirations (the Children's Home Association), understands the risk online social media has on young impressionable minds.

She explains, "Before the internet, the risk for children from strangers was mainly outside the home but this is no longer the case. We need to do all we can to educate and raise awareness to help young minds navigate their first experience of social media and throughout their childhood to equip them with skills to manage the risks.”

But with the majority of our kids being more tech-savvy than we are, it can feel like we'll never be able to keep up with what they're up to. With this guide for helping your child stay safe online, however, we will help you understand how to navigate the internet to ensure that your kid's activity never goes beyond harmless fun.

There are many ways in which we can keep track of our kids' behaviour and protect their data. We've created a 12-step guide to help you keep your children safe online...

12 tips for keeping your kids safe on social media

1. Talk about how they use social media

As soon as a teenager or child gets a phone, it seems like they're permanently attached to it. (We can't pretend we're not slightly guilty of that too!). But it rarely seems like they ever talk on it, so what on earth are they doing?!

From using apps and email to chatting on social media or doing live streams, there also appears to be an alarming trend for children to send each other semi-naked or provocative pictures of themselves and sexually explicit text messages.

So the starting point for any parent who is concerned about their child's screen time is to ask your child what they use social media for. Many platforms allow users to share photos, keep in contact and even watch each other's videos.

But while it may seem like innocent use, in 2021 it was reported that almost a quarter of 14-year-old girls in the UK have self-harmed after seeing something on social media, so it's important as a parent to be aware of the potential risks and prevent your child from being able to access disturbing content.

Some social media sites like X (formerly Twitter) enable users to put any statement out into the world that can be viewed and picked up by anyone, and such controversial statements have landed celebrities and politicians in trouble, so there's nothing to say it won't happen to your child too.

You can get an app to do almost anything these days. Tell you the weather, take vintage-style photos, help you learn a new language, play games - the list is endless! Some of them are free to download and others cost money. Some will also allow in-app purchasing. This is where a user will be asked, for example, if they want to buy more lives to continue the game or pay to get some extra features added to the app. You get apps from an app store, like Google App Store, Blackberry App World or Google Play.

And with this comes another level of worry for parents so it's vital to stay informed about the things your child wants to be able to do online so that you can fully prepare them about the platform (and its pitfalls) so they can help protect themselves from harm.

2. Make sure they know who their friends are (don’t let them accept request from people they don’t know)

It is far easier to set up anonymous or multiple accounts on Twitter than on Facebook, but that doesn't stop someone from pretending to be who they say they are (and who you think they are). Often accounts can be 'catfished' - a process by which an imposter pretends to be another person to trick someone into liking them, forging a friendship and even meeting up. To do this they often clone the profile of someone else, i.e. a celebrity/ someone with a higher status, or who would appeal to the victim. Fake photos are often used along with duplicate personal details that have been copied from another profile.

It's also common for strangers to pretend to be a child's friend who has set up another profile using fake excuses like they got 'locked out of' their other account or that they wanted a new profile with just a select number of friends. The profiles can look convincing, especially if the same profile images are used. So your child must set up code words / safe words with friends so that they can verify each other's identity online. A similar clever hack stopped an 11-year-old being abducted, so it is worth it and so simple to set up. If in doubt they can simply ask their friend the next time they see them if that profile is theirs before hastily clicking 'accept' when a friend request comes in.

On X platform make sure they know how to block other users who they don't want following their tweets. X has a comprehensive guide for parents.

child on video call with a man

(Image credit: Getty Images)

3. Keep their page and profile private

One way you can ensure your child protects themselves from danger is to set up a social media account with your child so you can discuss the privacy settings and protecting their online data with them and make sure they fully understand that it is not a place to post pictures or comments that are in any way private.

Make sure their pictures can only be seen by their 'friends' on Facebook, and that they never accept the friendship of someone they haven't met IN PERSON. Set up your own account - even if you don't want to use it - so you can fully understand how it works and how to better ensure your children stay safe online.

Tell them the story of an American teacher who wanted to show her class how quickly a picture could spread online. Within a few weeks, the picture was seen by nearly one million Facebook users. Ask your kids to think about that every time they post a picture - 'Would they be happy for a million people, including their parents, to see it?'

Teach your children how to block people and report things they find upsetting and make sure you sit down with your children and go through the Facebook checklist to keep them safe.

Meanwhile on Ask.fm you can help to protect your child from unwanted posts by making sure they tick the boxes to block anonymous questions and stop their answers from showing up on the 'Stream'.

4. Teach them how to block bullies and report harmful content

Quite simply, cyberbullying is bullying through the use of technology. Being able to contact someone by text, phone, email or chat room at any time of the day or night, has had the terrible side effect of a surge of cyberbullying. Being able to hide behind a computer or a phone means cowardly bullies can target victims really easily, and often when they are at home and should be feeling safe.

It's also far easier to set up anonymous or multiple accounts than on Facebook, so bullies can hide and make their victim think it's more than one person ganging up on them.

As with any form of bullying, it's important to let your children know they can talk to you about it. If they don't want to, encourage them to contact a bullying charity like BullyingUK. You need to encourage them to keep all messages - however embarrassing or hurtful they may be - so there is proof of what's been going on.

Don't ban them from using their phone or computer. This might make your child feel more isolated and the internet is a great way for them to find help. Tell your child not to reply to any nasty messages, however tempting. A bully is likely to be looking for a response, so make sure they don't get the satisfaction.

5. Limit location sharing (and advise against geo-tagging photos)

Location sharing does exactly what it says - shares your location. This can be harmful for a variety of reasons - a family holiday snap posted with a geo-location tag (displaying the geographical location) could alert burglars/strangers that your home is empty. An innocent post of your child's dinner with a geo-tag could pinpoint exactly where they live or what school or college your child goes to. This can put a child at greater risk of being stalked, as a stranger can work out their whereabouts.

6. Don’t post intimate pictures / one that jeopardise location/safety

The alarming trend for children to send each other semi-naked or provocative pictures of themselves and sexually explicit text messages can have devastating consequences especially if the pictures or messages get into the wrong hands or go viral - with the whole world seeing and sharing the content.

Most of the posts on Twitter are public, so there's a danger of your kids giving out personal information by mistake and preventing them from being able to stay safe online. Try to make your children understand that even though you can delete tweets, it only takes a second for someone to retweet their message and then there's no getting it back.

Twitter is quick and easy to use and its simplicity has led to lots of hot-headed celebrities and politicians saying things they've later come to regret. If adults have trouble thinking before they tweet, imagine the trouble kids can get themselves into!

Parents are also being warned of new 'sexting codes', which are being used by teenagers to hide the true nature of their conversations from their parents. These codes use anagrams, mixing letters and numbers to ask sexual requests or show sexual availability.

7. Educate them on the risks and dangers

All children are going to do things on the spur of the moment that they may regret later, so talk to them about how huge the fallout from a bad decision like this could be. They may trust someone not to show those pictures or texts to anyone else, but phones get lost and pinched and it would only take a few minutes for their reputation to be shattered.

Be aware that these sexting 'codes' are being used by young people and watch out if you see these particular ones being used by your teenager. Just having the knowledge that these codes exist and understanding what they mean gives you an insight and into helping your child stay safe online.

  • IWS/N: I want sex/ I want sex now
  • GNOC: Get naked on camera
  • CU46: See you for sex
  • GYPO: Get your pants off
  • 9/ Code 9: Parents watching
  • PIR: Parent in room
  • POS: Parent over shoulder
  • PAL: Parents are listening
  • LMIRL: Let's meet in real life
  • GNOC: Get naked on cam
  • LH6: Let's have sex
  • 8: Oral sex
  • SUGARPIC: Suggestive or erotic photograph
  • J/O: Jerking off
  • RU/18: Are you over 18?
  • S2R: Send to receive
  • 459: I love you

Explain to your children they should never retaliate to any abusive messages they receive, not to share any personal information or photos.

Ask.fm has been in the news for numerous stories of cyberbullying and the website's lack of regulation has caused lots of controversy. Anyone on Ask.fm can view another user's profile and content, and the site also allows users to post questions anonymously. Therefore your kids could run the risk of giving out their details by mistake or leave themselves open to unwanted and anonymous comments or even cyberbullying.

8. Follow age limit guidelines

In-app purchasing is being made clearer now, but some children have made the headlines for accidentally running up huge bills (we're talking hundreds of £s!) on their, or their parents' phones or tablets.

The age range on apps, which is often supplied on the information before you choose to download, is only provided by the company that designed the app, it's not overseen by an external body. So your children may be downloading apps which aren't age appropriate.

If your children are using your phone or tablet, they may well stray from the game they are playing onto other areas of your device that you don't want them accessing.

Make sure your kids don't have your password which might allow them to spend money while they are in an app. Better still, check out the policy of in-app purchases before you download the game. This information will be available for you at the app store. You can turn off in-app purchases and on some phones it's even possible to completely block them - check the settings on the phone to do this.

Below is a list of social media platforms and age-restrictions:

  • Facebook - (13+) The world's most popular social networking site allows people to share photos, keep in contact and watch each other's videos. Facebook requires everyone to be at least 13 years old before they can create an account (some regions such as South Korea, Spain or Quebec have different age requirements). Its user agreement states, "Creating an account with false info is a breach of our terms. This includes accounts registered on behalf of someone under 13."
  • X (formerly Twitter) - (13+ but is rated 17+) The Internet phenomenon of X lets users say whatever they want, but it is rated 17+ because, as the App Store descriptor says, it may include 'profanity, crude humour, mild sexual content'.
  • WhatsApp - (16+) Users must be over 16, as to connect you with others, WhatsApp checks your phone's address book for other users and automatically suggests these as your WhatsApp contacts. It also updates your WhatsApp contact list whenever your phone contacts sign up for the app.
  • Instagram - (13+) A social media app which allows people to share photos and videos with their friends by posting them on their profile. There has sadly been a surge in mental health disorders among young people in recent years, with a 2018 report stating that one in eight children under the age of 19 have suffered from mental disorders such as anxiety and depression. Excessive social media has widely been blamed for causing this shocking rise of mental illness in young people, as children using social media platforms such as Instagram are more likely to compare themselves with others and have their moods impacted by likes and comments.
  • TikTok - (13+) TikTok requires its users to be at least 13 years old. Despite users having to be aged 13 and up the age ratings for TikTok are, a little confusingly, 12+ on Apple's App Store and "Parental Guidance Recommended" on the Google Play Store.
  • Snapchat - (13+) Snapchat's age requirement is 13 years old. Users aged 13-17 have additional privacy settings. Age verification is limited, relying on self-reporting.
  • Pinterest - (13+) It's user policy states, "We ask for age-related information, like birthday, to personalise your Pinterest experience, ads and recommendations, and to help provide a better experience for the younger people in our community."
  • Reddit - (13+) You must be at least 13 years old to use Reddit. Most forums here are not child-appropriate.
  • YouTube - (13+) You must be at least 13 years old to use the Service; however, children of all ages may use the Service and YouTube Kids (where available) if enabled by a parent or legal guardian. If you are under 18, you represent that you have your parent or guardian's permission to use the Service.
  • LinkedIn - (was 16+ now 13+) The age limit was dropped from 16+ to 13+ with children's profiles having default settings making less of their personal information publicly visible, with more prominent links to safety information. Dr Bernie Hogan, of the Oxford Internet Institute, said the development, which takes effect on 12 September 2013 according. to the BBC, would help children "differentiate between the public profile they want for employment [and] the personal profile they share on Facebook with their friends and family".
  • Threads - (12+) Minimum age limit of 12 in the Apple App Store and Parental Guidance in the Google Play Store. However, the minimum age rating for Instagram is still 13 and over. The Threads app follows Instagram's community guidelines with some additions of its own.
  • Twitch (13+) The Twitch Services are not available to persons under the age of 13. If you are between the ages of 13 and the age of legal majority in your jurisdiction of residence, you may only use Twitch Services under the supervision of a parent or legal guardian who agrees to be bound by these Terms of Service.
  • AskFm (13+) A popular social networking site that lets people around the world ask and answer questions. You can't use ASKfm if you are younger than 13. In almost all countries, if you are 13 and over, you can allow us to use your data.

stay safe online

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Over a third of three to four-year-olds use the internet at home, so it's important to be on the ball from when they are really little. Check out the reviews of any app before you download it for your kids. This should give you a steer about what other parents think about it and whether or not they are old enough to use it.

With older children, discuss which apps they have and talk to them if you think any of them are inappropriate or could end up costing them a lot of money.

It might be a nice idea to suggest some apps for your children to download, then you can be sure you're happy with them. There are some reviews on Common Sense Media to give you an idea.

9. Set some ground rules / limits on usage

If you have a child who's particularly keen on technology and surfing the web, it might be a good idea to put in place some time limits for their usage. It's very rare, but some children's online life can take over their real one, and this can lead to all sorts of problems. Kids sitting up in bed 'til the small hours is also going to leave them tired and grumpy.

It's likely that you're the one who's bought the phone/tablet/laptop etc so you'll have a chance to set some parental controls on it before you give it to them. The user manual should tell you how to do this. It's also worth searching online for other parents' tips for that particular device.

Remember, gaming devices have Internet access, so make sure you set parental controls on them too. As well as setting controls on the devices, make sure you've set them through your service provider (BT, Sky, Talk Talk, Virgin Media etc.) too.

Keeping all devices out of the kids' bedrooms, especially after they've gone to bed is a good idea. You could also set time limits for games consoles and apps. thinkuknow website has some really useful advice on how to speak to your children about websites they should and shouldn't visit.

  • Content rules - Images and videos that your children can and can not view on Instagram (e.g. inappropriate images or videos)
  • Time rules - Implement windows of time in which your children can use their devices (e.g. no use of devices an hour before waking up or an hour before going to sleep)
  • Context rules - Set out places and situations in which phones are banned altogether (e.g. during family meal times or special occasions, in the car)

stay safe online

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10. Check their privacy settings

Setting up apps like Google Family Link, allow you to approve or block apps your child wants to download. For any apps that are downloaded, review the privacy settings to make sure they are in control of how their information is used, who can see their account and what they share.

11. Help them choose strong passwords / authentication

Here are Top 5 expert tips from Bitcoincasinos.com for keeping passwords safe:

  1. Use a password manager on a browser. Internet browsers like Google Chrome or Safari will offer to save passwords for you. You can fill in passwords on a signed-in profile and these will stay protected and ready to access when you open your chosen browser. But be careful not to store passwords on a shared computer, or make sure you have password protection on your profile on said computer.
  2. Password manager Apps. There are many free and paid password manager apps that can create and hold all of your passwords in a secure app. This can come with extra security if you have two-factor verification settings and basic security on your phone such as face-verification.
  3. Memorable passwords. Everyone's heard of using birthdays, first pet names or even mother's maiden name to create a password. However, your best bet for remembering a password that also cannot be guessed easily by hackers is to use a phrase within your password that is completely unique to you. This shouldn't be a birthday or a pet, as this is potentially easy access information for hackers, especially if you are on social media. You want a phrase that will jog your memory if you ever lose a password, unique school nicknames or something personal to you is always a good start. This phrase should be combined with more words and numbers / symbols to create a really strong password, that you hopefully don't forget.
  4. Old fashioned method. Be sure to save your private key both offline and digitally. Ironically, the most secure method against hackers is the good old fashioned pen and paper method. Even Russia's state security supposedly reverted to typewriters after leaks. 
  5. Strong and unique password. Weak passwords can leave you vulnerable to attacks and hacks. Whilst the decentralised nature of blockchain technology makes it secure, any chain is only as strong as its weakest link. Combine letters, numbers and symbols and have at least 12 characters. Use a combination of upper and lower case characters. As an example Myname123$ would still only take a hacker around five minutes to crack. By adding a symbol in the middle of a password you automatically increase hack time by around three days.

stay safe online

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12. Consider parental controls that monitor activity

There are some great activity monitoring tools available that allow you to see which sites your kids are visiting, what they're searching for, and who they're talking to via instant messaging.

It may feel a little Big Brother, we know, but it can also act as a deterrent if your kids know you have access to what they're looking at. It also means that should you see something you don't like the look of, you can have that conversation with them straight away.

For instance, KidLogger allows you to monitor your kids' activity from your mobile phone.

In other family news, here are 15 'life-saving' questions to ask your child if they’re online gaming - plus 5 expert tips for keeping your kids safe and did you know that screens aren't the only reason kids aren't playing outdoors.

Selina Maycock
Senior Family Writer

Selina is a Senior Family Writer for GoodtoKnow and has more than 16 years years of experience. She specialises in royal family news, including the latest activities of Prince George, Charlotte, Louis, Archie and Lilibet. She also covers the latest government, health and charity advice for families. Selina graduated from the University of Sheffield in 2006 with a degree in Journalism, and gained her NCTJ and NCE qualifications. During her career, she’s also written for Woman, Woman's Own, Woman&Home, and Woman's Weekly as well as Heat magazine, Bang Showbiz - and the Scunthorpe Telegraph. When she's not covering family news, you can find her exploring new countryside walking routes, catching up with friends over good food, or making memories (including award-winning scarecrows!)