Amy Condon is a mum to 3 kids, who are all under 3! Yes, you heard us right. Each week she tells us all about the ups and downs of bringing up 3 children so close in age. This week Amy talks about how her youngest's 1st birthday marks the end of her being a baby...
'So, there are a few unexplained stains on the carpets, the house is full of half-deflated balloons, and we're going to be eating leftovers for a week. My baby girl is a baby no more. Yesterday, she turned 1 and now the party is over, there's nothing left to do but clean up and come to terms with the fact that it's all over. Not the party. That was great fun, but it wasn't going to last forever. No, what's over is my time as a mummy of babies.
'It's the oddest feeling. Not a sadness exactly, as watching my girls grow is wonderful to see. Not really a longing, either. It's not that I want to have more children. It just feels so strange. So, well, final.
'M is a confident walker, happily taking off across the garden all by herself. And she's talking more and more, even copying her sisters by climbing on their potty and saying: 'Did a poo!' But as long as her age was counted in months rather than years, it felt like there was still a tiny bit of that infant left.
'As her birthday dawned, though, I couldn't help but reminiscence about the little newborn I held in my arms a year ago, the way her tiny fingers looked on my chest as she fed for the first time, the way she snuggled into me, so delicate and helpless. It's almost impossible to believe that the cheeky, chubby toddler in front of me, is the same 7lb, 8oz baby who gave us all a scare by refusing to breathe for the first 2 minutes of her life. She's not helpless, she's not tiny and she doesn't cling only to me for protection. In short, she's not a baby. And she hasn't been for a while.
'I don't want to be pregnant, I don't want to give birth, and heaven only knows how on earth I'd find time to care for another child. But I still feel wistful. When the twins turned 1, we already knew we wanted to try for at least one more child. OK, so we assumed it'd involve another round of fertility treatment and we'd therefore have a bit longer to prepare, so when M did make her surprise appearance, it was a bit of a shock. But it was still there as a possibility.
'Now, knowing that part of my life is over, I just need a little time to adjust. I'm not a new young mum any more. Hardly even a young one at all really. In a couple of years, the twins will be in school and M will start nursery. I'll find a job and have to get up and go to work like everyone else.
I've been unbelievably lucky to be able to spend every minute with my girls, and for that I'm so grateful. When I do join the rat race again, it'll be with a head full of fantastic memories. And with 3 gorgeous, growing girls to come home to. I've changed in so many ways since becoming a mum, so I'm going to stop being wistful and start appreciating every minute of the 'mummy of big girl' adventure I'm just beginning.'
Did you find it hard to accepting your babies are growing up? Tell us about your children in our comments section below or on Facebook.
Amy's other blog posts...
- Amy's next blog - 3 under 3: Don't you want me?
- Amy's previous blog - 3 under 3: Separated at birth
- All of Amy's blogs