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'If you wouldn't do it to a mum, don't do it to a dad' Giovanna Fletcher shares powerful message about parenting balance

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Giovanna and Tom Fletcher
Giovanna Fletcher chose Father's Day to share a powerful message about the important role dads play in their families.

On Sunday, the mum-of-two posted a gorgeous black and white picture to Instagram of husband Tom holding both children (one on each hip) gazing up at the iconic Disney castle.

IS TOM A HANDS ON DAD? Over the last three years there's one question that has started grating on me, and that’s 'Is Tom a hands-on dad?' It's something I get asked a lot, along with 'What's he like as a father?' or 'Has he surprised you in his new role?' I'll say straight away that Tom is an amazing dad. He is one half of the parenting team and we very much do everything together. I feel fully supported in the knowledge that parenting, for us, is a mutual responsibility. I wouldn't be able to have children and keep working in the way I am without having Tom to tag team with. I guess the thing that has started to irk me about the above questions, is that no one would ever ask Tom what I was like as a mum, or ponder over my involvement, or dare to ask if I was any good at it. So the fact Tom, and all Dads, are having their skills questioned as though being 'hands-on' is optional is a murky area for me. I feel like we've moved on as a society. Dads are more involved. Well, in my eyes, they should be. Although I do understand that it’s not always possible even if they'd like to be. With more and more women going back to work it's impossible for them to keep such a tight hold of the reigns. Control and responsibly have to be passed over to the dads, because parenting is a full time role within itself and if both parents are out working and keeping the family afloat financially then it's only right that the demands of family life get distributed equally too. Don't dumb down my husband or any other dad who's decided to accept the shift and readjust accordingly for the good of the family. Don't treat dads who interact with their children like they’re doing something alien that warrants your praise. If you wouldn't do it to a mum, don't do it to a dad. So, to all the dads out there doing the best for their families - whether you've stopped your 'day job' to take over the main bulk of responsibilities, whether you're sharing everything as evenly as possible, or whether you're out doing shift work and working all the hours possible to provide for your family - whatever you're doing with your family in mind, thank you. HAPPY FATHER’S DAY!

A post shared by Jun 18, 2017 at 1:46am PDT


'Over the last three years there's one question that has started grating on me, and that's 'Is Tom a hands-on dad?',' she wrote alongside the image.

'I'll say straight away that Tom is an amazing dad. He is one half of the parenting team and we very much do everything together. I feel fully supported in the knowledge that parenting, for us, is a mutual responsibility. I wouldn't be able to have children and keep working in the way I am without having Tom to tag team with.'


Pointing out that no one would ever ask Tom the same of her, she continues: 'With more and more women going back to work it's impossible for them to keep such a tight hold of the reigns. Control and responsibly have to be passed over to the dads, because parenting is a full time role within itself and if both parents are out working and keeping the family afloat financially then it's only right that the demands of family life get distributed equally too.'

'Don't dumb down my husband or any other dad who's decided to accept the shift and readjust accordingly for the good of the family. Don't treat dads who interact with their children like they’re doing something alien that warrants your praise.'

'If you wouldn't do it to a mum, don't do it to a dad.'

I'm sure this is meant to be the other way around and they're meant to be trying to get me into the sea or splashing me while I look on with bemusement. 🙈 I've seen a lot of posts about post-pregnancy bodies this week (Go @mother_of_daughters). At times it does bother me how much my body has changed, but I know I don't ever want it to stop me having fun with the boys. They aren't going to look back and think 'Gosh, Mum had terrible cellulite, stretch marks and wobbled a lot', but they would notice if I sat out of games and didn't make the most of my time with them. My body isn't what it used to be, but even when I was a size 8 I was unhappy with how I looked. It's not a size thing. It's not a weight thing. It's an inner feeling thing. My body gave me the two most important things in my life. So thank you to you in all your wobbles, lumps and bumps. To me, you are perfectly imperfect. Xx ❤️ #nofilter #beachbody #bodypositive #loveyourbabyloveyourbody #mum #love #myheart #motherhood

A post shared by May 28, 2017 at 3:32am PDT


The post has been met with swathes of support from her 860,000 followers, with many taking to the comment section to celebrate their own hands-on husbands.

'Whenever I go out for a few drinks with my friends I get asked if my husband is babysitting! Ummmmmm no he's just at home with his children!!' wrote one.

Another said: 'This is so bloody true!! I also get asked the same question time and time again!'

Continued below...


A third added: 'Absolutely agree. My girls have an amazing dad and wouldn't be nearly as happy or get half the enjoyment out of life without him and his crazy ways. As a team we make their world complete.'

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