Actress Melissa Rauch has confirmed that she and husband Winston are expecting their first child together.
The Big Bang Theory star, who plays Bernadette in the hit comedy show, shared the news in a candid article for Glamour magazine, where she explained that although she was thrilled to be pregnant, the path to parenthood had been tinged with sadness, as she’d suffered a previous miscarriage.
‘Here is the only statement regarding my pregnancy that doesn’t make me feel like a complete fraud,’ she writes in the piece. ‘”Melissa is expecting her first child. She is extremely overjoyed, but if she’s being honest, due to the fact that she had a miscarriage the last time she was pregnant, she’s pretty much terrified at the moment that it will happen again”.’
‘She feels weird even announcing this at all, and would rather wait until her child heads off to college to tell anyone, but she figures she should probably share this news before someone sees her waddling around with her mid-section protruding and announces it first.’
Melissa, 37, describes her miscarriage as ‘one of the most profound sorrows I have ever felt in my life’, explaining that she felt a ‘primal depression‘ for a long time after the loss, but felt a pressure to ‘get over’ her grief, because it’s not a subject that is openly discussed.
‘There really is no template for how to process these emotions,’ she says. ‘You’re not necessarily going to a funeral or taking time off from work to mourn, but that doesn’t change the fact that something precious has been unexpectedly taken from your life.’
In the feature, Melissa also addresses the issue of asking people about their plans for children, admitting: ‘I know I’ve asked women about their reproducing situation in the past (as most of us unintentionally have at some point or another). It comes from a well-meaning, good place.’
However, she goes on to add that she hopes that speaking out about fertility struggles will make others think twice before uttering what kind be a profoundly personal and emotional question in this way.
‘Bottom line: I’ve come to the conclusion that unless I clearly see an infant emerging from its uterine homeland and its mother is shouting at me: “Over here! Look at me! I am birthing a baby right now in the back of my 2007 Saturn!” it’s probably best not to ask her about reproduction,’ she quips.
Of her current pregnancy, she says that the loss has made her incredibly ‘grateful’, and expresses hope that it will make her better mother when her baby enters the world.
‘Although I can’t categorize these lessons of humble appreciation and gratitude as “reasons for this happening,” I will consider them a silver lining,’ she concludes.
‘To all the women out there who are dealing with fertility issues, have gone through a miscarriage or are going through the pain of it currently, allow me to leave you with this message: You are not alone. And, it is perfectly OK to not be OK right now.’
Fans have rushed to applaud Melissa for her bravery and honesty, with one writing on Instagram: ‘congratulations! incredibly blessed, and thank you for sharing your story! this required courage and strength and I think it’s very powerful!’
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‘What a perfectly wonderful and heartfelt way to talk about this,’ another agreed. ‘I have had 3 miscarriages and ended up having to do IVF before getting my little guy. Your descriptions about the emotions and process of grieving was me to a T. I felt as if this was written about me. So incredibly happy for you – blessings to you and your little bundle @themelissarauch’.