ADHD in children

ann-marie patrick, 12 months

my brother is 16 and sufferes with adhd the hyperactivity has improved with age and puberty. the thing with him though he is VERY AGGRESSIVE AND HE ALSO ARGUES WITH MY DAD TO TRY AND BE HEAD OF THE HOUSE ITS THAT BAD HES THRETENED TO STAB HIM TWICE HE DOESHT KNOW THE CONCIQUENCES ARE THAT HE WILL GO TO PRISSON ETHER FOR MURDED OR ATTEMPTED MURDER MY MUM HAS EVEN SAID TO ME THAT IF HE CARRIES ON SHE WILL PUT HIM IN A CARE HOME. I AM ON MY LAST STRAW I AM SO CLOSE TO MOOVING OUT BECAUSE OF IT. PLEASE HELP

Lynda Beattie, about 1 year

It's really difficult sometimes to remember to look at the positive in the child with ADHD but there are lots of positive things (altho i know that in the blackest moments you will struggle to have one positive thought!) My son is 12 and has been diagnosed since he was 6 Up until now we have managed without medication. We are going to try Equasim because he has started sencondary school and is really struggling to concentrate on the much harder school work and cope within the stricter boundries of the classroom. We will have to see how it goes and take one step at a time. Apart from my own son, i work as a pupil support assistant in a class with several children with ADHD and i find them and my own son so lively, funny, interesting and vital compared to some children. They are quick witted, quick thinkers, quick to solve probllems and find solutions and truly amazing. Some of the most successful inventors had ADHD and i can understand why. I feel that the biggest and most important thing for children with ADHD is their SELF ESTEEM. They MUST have a healthy/good self esteem to win over the problems and challenges that comes with the territory.... and unfortunately for all us exhausted parents out here... it's largely down to us to protect and boost it and make sure they know how amazing they are.

rosalind, about 1 year

I have two children with a.d.h.d. My son was put on medication at first when he was 7, then taken off it by the consultant, whom told me i was a bad mum, and that there was nothing wrong with him. I then had him seen by a professor whom told me my son had a.d.h.d and o.d.d. Putting him om medication was the best thing that could have been done, as the improvement was instant. He was better behaved, i could talk to him, and his violence improved so much as well. My son is now a teenager, and things have gone down hill again, as he refuses to take medication. My daughter, has just been put back on medication and she is 9. I new from a very early age that she had a.d.h.d. But doctors were reluctant to label her. My daughter also has, learning difficulties, behavioural problems, and is going through assement for Autisc Spectrum Disorder. Life can be very difficult, as i do not have any help, but can also be very rewarding.

Tina, about 1 year

hi all, my daughter has adah she was diagnosed at age 10 why so late because no one would listen to me one consultant told me when she was 6 that there was nothing wrong with her so i managed with her just, she was fine on the medication at primary school but is now in high school and is in the head's words at critical point, they are wanting to exclude her, how am i supposed to help her i dont no what to do next i have asked for a phycologist to see her but my docor says it is the school's duty and the school say it is my doctors im at my wits end along with her 15 yr old brother it is like world war 3 sometimes my mum blames me for being too soft on her but what am i supposed to do when she gets upset an screems id rather be dead i cant leave her like that i have to calm her dowm what is most upsetting is the fact that she is so loving sometimes her self esteme is suffering along with her schooling she is a very bright and i cant see her achieving her potential and becoming yet anougher problem child no one wants because all schools look at now are league tabels, shes not coping and is suffering through no falt of her own i think she should be in a special school but when i ask about that all i get in reply is a big fat nothing.

wendy hall, about 1 year

i no my son as adhd but can i get help no hes in bankside school because no other school will have him he as tablets at night to help him sleep now peter is getting older and bigger even the teachers at his school are comeing to the end i need help for peter hes getting older and stronger i fear for his fiture hes a lovely little boy he just need the medication before he hunts some one as he as hurt nearly all his teachers so i hope some 1 out there can help

su walton, about 1 year

my son is 12 and has quite a high case of adhd and is on the highest dose of medication for his age and even that doesnt work fully he was diagnosed at the age of 6 after a year of trying to convince doctors that he wasnt just playing up for a long time he was doing so well but since starting secondary school things are so much worse he is even more violent and verbally abusive, friends and family find it so hard to understand how a lad who can get such high grades in class and be a bright intelligent student can behave in such a terrible way school are not supportive and also seem to have a problem understanding adhd and how to deal with it he is so aggresive towards me and can hit kick bite and throw things at me he doesnt do it to his dad just me but he is verbally aggressive to every one else i would love some advice from someone who understands about how to deal with it some weeks he is grounded every night and has all priviliges removed that it just seems unfair

Christina, about 1 year

Hi everyone. Have only really started trawling the net for some support on this issue. We have a 7 year old son who was diagnosed with ADHD five months ago. Probably like most people, we have always known that there was and still is something different about him. Grandparents blame us for the way he is and don't understand the ADHD umbrella of issues. This makes things very frustrating. Friends and parents of friends don't know that he has been diagnosed with the condition. We felt it better not to tell anyone, so as not to bring even more attention to the problems it already causes. I am still torn on this decision, because sometimes I want everyone to know so they have some understanding as to why he verbally and physically lashes out without any reason...why he cannot sit still or concentrate when someone is speaking etc..... He is currently on medication which has had the most fantastic and dramatic change to his school days. Since January he has not been in any bother whatsover and has even achieved good behaviour awards.....which were all out of his reach for the previous two and a half years. Unfortunately, outwith school, the medication does not always seem to have the desired affect....it really depends on what we are doing of a weekend or holiday. my frustrations lie with the authorities. No real investigations have been made as to why this has happened to our son. We are in 2008 and there surely must be some kind of research being made. I have found something on the net earlier today relating ADHD to difficult birth. My son was born with the help of venteuse, forceps and a needle to his head to read his heart beat. It was a traumatic birth for both me and my son. My GP, health visitor or psychologist have never mentioned that there could be a connection. Has anyone else had the same problems as me?

N/A, about 1 year

i have adhd i am only 12 and i was diagnosed at the age of 3 its not that bad in me but even though i have medication for it then attention thing still stays with me i have to cope with my so called friends who obviously are not aware of what is wrong and are always mean to me and i try to make jokes which are funny but some are they put it hard on me and stuff like this can lead to depression and can lead to bad thoughts if you know what mean so be careful with your children and ask them if they are ok and don't make them afraid to be honest and show there feelings

neeve, about 1 year

After 6 yrs of going through what I thought was complete madness, my son was diagnosed with adhd last month. How do I feel? Not great. Although I knew there was something different, it was what became the norm in the household. I have 4 other children, 2 of which are younger- 3yr old twins. The professionals found it easy to use them as a reason for attention seeking, but I was dealing with (not good) situations for years before that. My son is now 8. I am now finding myself in the painful decision of medication, of which I cant get my head round, but, to all parents who are battling what they think could be adhd, dont give up, its a long road but gut instinct is usually right and your child cannot fight this alone.

Craig Welsh, about 1 year

Diet Tip: i found way back when i first found out that i had adhd that i could help myself in away. forgien foods helped because the forgien foods don't have all the e numbers in it so i could enjoy the food i liked but without the e numbers. now for the ones that don't know e numbers such as ones in cola,cherryade can make your child hyperactive you can get the food i have been taking about from places like aldi.lidl

Craig Welsh, about 1 year

Hi to all, i am a young adult with adhd and reading some of your storys makes me look at the past and say to myself i used to be like that. regarding school behavior its because children with adhd don't get the help they need in school or sometimes its the school not knowing alot about adhd.

victoria Bodenham, about 1 year

I have a daughter who is 18 and hid her condition well until she went to High School.We live in the country and she attended a small village school but on entreing high school her world fell apart and it took until she was 15 before we got to see a phscoligist who told me within 30 minuets of meeting her that she had Aspergers but it the took a year to have it made formal ,then they dropped the bomdsheel that she has ADHD as well .Where we live there is no help and i have fought to try and get help but there is nothing in our area .We do not medicate her but she is unable to work she leaves the house very little and i care for her.How did she hide it and be that bad I ask myself ?Well the answer to that is that she is very bright and girls do tend to hide it better.Most people think that the Children with theese cinditions are stupid and non verbale my daughter is not and I try very hard to listen and understand what she says and I have found it fasinating .She coped for years buy learning very quickly that she was differant and she talks about putting on a suit of normality the problem with that was that she started spending hours in her room not on this plantet .She would lie on her beed and be awake but not there years later she was able to tell me that its like defraging a computer her brain was on overload and trying to file all the info.The result of coping was she was suicidle and in year 9 I tolk her out of school and for a year I had her at home the school still got the money for her as she was still on the books but she got no help from anywhere and I spent my time with her 2 other children and large phone bills trying to get help for her .For the last year of school she managed at times 7 hours a week at a small learning centre but we had to cut it to 5 hours as we started to get the behaviour that we had not seen for a year she was feeling stress and I knew what that ment depression hours on the bed ,going round and round in circles walking backwards and forwards and I could not and would not do that to her so I cut her hours to the 5 she coped with that it was also an hour each way to get there and she gets very sick in cars so for her it was hard but by the end of school age 16 she took exams work out with the school she was ment to take hers in the special needs unit with a few other kids but when she got there they put her in the main hall but she did it she got c's and d's which with all she had been through and little schooling and help I think it was wonderful and I am so proud of her.What does she do now nothing there is nothing she can not cope in the world should you feel sad ?do I feel sad ?No she is happy 99% of the time our relationship with her is the most wonderful thing in the world .She can be herself we do not expect her to put her suit on so she no longer lays on her bed not of this world she is not depressed and though sometimes she is like a six year old and people give srange looks and tut at her when she sits on the pavement because she is tied and sits oa the shop floor to look at jewelery because it sparkles and is pretty thats there problem she doesn't hurt anyone.The rest of the sory is this a year ago it became obvious that my son was struggleing year 7 at high school was a bit iffy so in may I went to our GP and asked for a referal I had ask the school several times for help and in the end it was down to me again it is now March and on Monday we were told he has ADHD but that he sent the form off of the conners scale and on top of that we think he has Aspergers too .The doctors want us back there thoughts yes it does look like it but if not there is something else wrong its just find what.Like with my daughter I am fighting allthough I know more this time .The school don't like it much but they are a least trying this time.My advice to others is YOU DO NOT HAVE TO BE REFURED BY A PROFESONAL YOU CAN DO IT YOURSELF phone the educational services yourself make waves and insist on your child being asessed and when they tell you that the things that they are doing works with others then don't be afraid to shout that each child is an indavidual ,they day we stop expecting our children to be sheep the better.I am sorry to say that at 13 my son has asked to be medicated as he hate's the way he is so we will try a non stimulant and see how it goes but we don't want to.to other parents you are not alone and to your children you are wonderful incredable people and don't let others tell you you are stupid because you are not.

Karen, about 1 year

I am the mother of a 16 year old boy who was diagnosed with ADHD at the age of 6 and excluded from school a few weeks later whilst adjusting to his medication. I am here to tell you that there is light at the end of the tunnel but it is a long hard slog and you have to be prepared to fight all the way, not only with schools, etc but with your own child. I vetted all the schools in my area and only put him in schools which I checked out and found had great teachers and support staff who knew what they were talking about. At one point I even taught him at home. Strict boundaries were the key with my son, both at school and at home - when I said No, I meant No, if I gave in just once because I was exhausted or at the end of my tether, you can guarantee he took full advantage and persisted for even longer next time! If he did something wrong, I never shouted at him, just sent him somewhere quiet for time out and told him that when he was ready we would sit and talk about what had gone wrong. It worked because he is now a fantastic teen and I don't seem to get half the problems my friends get with their teenagers. It's hard work and you will probably have a lot of tears along the way but don't give up. You're lucky, there is more support and understanding out there now than there was 10 years ago, you just have to find it. Good luck!

sharon scobbie, about 1 year

hi i have an 8 year old boy with adha as well,i new there was something amiss from the day he was born it took untill he was 7 and a really bad year at school to get to the bottem of it he also has autistic tendences so we get the highs and the lows. i am so disapointed with the lack of suport out there and the lack of information and advice in what kind of help there is available that i can ask for or even expect to get to help support my family i also have an 11 year old who is under much preasure and strain of having to live with adhd

charmaine, about 1 year

hi all i have a daughter with adhd she is now 9. she is on medication, she had a terrible time at her last primary school, so i moved her hoping people would be different with here as they only see her on the meds..shes at home with me i think that says it all..iv always said she should be in a special needs school with people that understand here..i totaly agree if they dont understand they can not deal with her-iv been going on a site called (i hope you are allowed to show other sites here)www.parentscentre.gov.uk/forum/ read the forum there..people are kind and will help any way they can i also read on there somewhere that it is against the law to expel a child with special needs !! hope this helps you all. angela i knew my daughter was different from the day she was born it took 6 years for anyone to listen..i had my youngest and was at the end of my tether (they say it was the change in her life) when my health visitor called around i exploded with all my emotions and my daughter suddenly showed the side i wanted her to..people then seemed to listen to me they called the school nurse in she could see it instantly and then they set the ball rolling, although she is diagnosed with adhd and they think she may have other stuff to..schooling is still a big problem and is an on going battle..try these different people, school nurse, health visitor, your doctor(although i never found my doctor any help) keep annoying them ringing them taking your son to them its a fight but eventually someone will listen..good luck :(

pauline, about 1 year

my grandson aged 9 has adhd and all sorts of other conditions attatched to it eg. aspergers now we think he has a variety oif turrets and more . he as been to main stream schools and as others have said they do not understand the condition well enough to be able to cope with the individual child and as all mothers with these oh so loving at times children they need understanding!!!! not punishment . WE have fought long and hard to get hin the special school he needed and 9 years on and many arguments with doctors and school do gooders he is now settled into a special school near to where his mum lives he gets transport there and back ,small classes and teachers who know every thing there is to know about these so called naughty children!! (they cannot help it ,but you try telling people that DONT UNDERSTAND.)so i can only stress to all those other mothers out there KEEP PUSHING THE AUTHORITIES.DONT TAKE NO FOR AN ANSWER.

brenda, about 1 year

My son has ADHD. He has already been suspended a number of times from school, and is about to be expelled for his behavior. we have tried all sorts of different medicines and found that the slow release tablets do not work or work too late as they release over a 12 hour period. Equasim we found was the best for school at least. we do not give him the tablets over the weekends as it gives him a break and he needs one we think. Its very hard for me and his father as it puts a strain on our relationship and we work hard to keep it together for our other 2 children aswell. Schools do find it hard because they do not always have the teachers that can deal with this type of behavior. (although i think all schools should) I also find that if he is being annoyed or upset by the other children in the classroom or playground, the teachers tend to blame my son rather than listen to him before they react. I have found that if we listen to what he has to say so he can calm himself down at the same time, this does work sometimes.

charmaine, about 1 year

i get no help at all with my 8 year old boy he wees the bed all the time he wont sit still for 2 secs he dont sleep alot and i just wish someone will help me with this as i dont know what to do

sarah, about 1 year

my friends 8 year old son has just been expelled from school following an incident last week, apparently a teacher gave him a sweet which then set him off and yet the school don't seem to accept responsibility. I don't know enough about the condition to advise or what direction to point her in with regards to expert help for her and the family. Any advice appreciated. Thanks

angela, about 1 year

I also have found this information usual I am convinced my oldest son son suffers from (ADHA) but no one seems to listen or want to know.

Christine, about 1 year

http://sg-petition.blogspot.com/ I hope you might spare a few moments to read this and respond. Many others are in this position and something has to change... Chris DiNucci

nikki selvey, about 1 year

I have found this information very usefull for my course work in childcare. Thank you

Kay Streeter, over 2 years

The section of treatment with Ritalin hasnt been up dated to what Dr Tim Kendall has been saying about the use of Ritalin. I would some help and advice of it, my soon to be 9 year old son will be diagnosed in January with ADHD, reason being he is epiletic and is on a 12week programme to be weened off Epilim (previously the coloured epilim now the sugar free clear epilim) and weened onto Lamotrigine and the Doctor does not want to presribe another drug (Ritalin) as 1 could stop the other working. He has the following sypmtoms of cant concentrate, distrubtive, not aware of dangers and concequences etc... Since being on Epilim he is very aggressive and emotional more so now than before. With what is now being said about Ritalin i want information on alternative methods as opposed to drugs. Please Help..