Sex for you and your partner is all about intimacy and love. It's the best way for both of you to tell each other how you feel and you know instinctively what turns each of you on.
You usually have sex on special occasions after a bit of wining and dining or even sharing a bath together which is great because you're connecting emotionally and physically.
Of course sex is best when there's love and romance involved but don't forget about a good old-fashioned bit of lust-fuelled bonking as well!
Your sex life doesn't have to be straight from Titanic and Gone with the Wind, so please leave space now and again to get down and dirty!
A varied sex life is a healthy sex life and as good as slow, deep-connecting sessions sound with both being generous about pleasing one other I would suggest you also inject some much more physical, greedy and off-the-cuff sessions in there too, with both of you taking turns to be more selfish and demanding.
This way you can keep track of what really pleases your partner rather than making assumptions and being overly polite about things.
Judi James is a sex, relationships and body language expert and author of The Body Language Bible, available from June.
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