Sex problems: 'We have different sex drives'
If he could, my husband would have sex every night, while I only want to do it a couple of times a week. This is turning into a big problem. Can you help?
Dr Petra says
It's a myth that couples' sex drives are always in sync. In most relationships one person often wants sex more than the other.
There is no 'right' amount for couples to have sex, although we often forget quality is more important than quantity. Your husband may crave frequent sex for a number of reasons
1. He has a high sex drive.
2. He believes it's something men should do.
3. He wants more intimacy.
4. He feels insecure or anxious about his performance or your relationship.
Reassure him you love him but explain your different sex drives are making you unhappy. Possible solutions include him masturbating when you don't have sex, and both of you enjoying intimacy in the form of cuddles and affectionate communication whether it's a 'sex night' or not.
Relationship therapy can help if you need support to resolve the situation.
- Next: 'He can't get an erection'
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By Dr Petra Boynton
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