He's having an affair: Should you stay?

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If you decide your relationship is worth saving and you're willing to try again, ask yourself these questions:

1. Has he guaranteed that the affair is over?
2. Do you both really understand what went wrong and why it happened?
3. Have you both found a new, better way to resolve future problems in your relationship?
4. Are you both willing to get help and advice from an expert if you feel it's necessary?

If you can answer 'yes' to these questions then there's a good chance your relationship can recover.

But be warned: You can't just 'get over' an affair. 'Trust takes a moment to break but much longer to rebuild, says Paula Hall. 'Your partner needs to accept that he will have to be more accountable to you for quite some time.

'For example, if you want to check his telephone and bank statements regularly, then he needs to let you. The recovery process takes time. You'll probably never forget what happened, but you'll learn to keep it somewhere else in your heart and remember it less often.'

- Next: Should you go?