Neither of us had really had a proper relationship before each other, so everything we did together was pretty new, including our sex life.
It wasn't that we never had sex, just that it wasn't the biggest part of our relationship.
Looking back at the way we were with each other, it was obvious that we were more brother and sister than husband and wife.
The thing is, in so many ways we're soulmates. We share the same interests, love the same music, enjoy the same TV programmes... everything.
We were married by the age of 23 and had two children very quickly.
It was only as Tom got a bit older and started meeting people at work and when we went out socially that he realised that he was gay.
He finally admitted it about 5 years ago, although I'd guessed a long time before and we've had to spend a lot of time working out what to do.
We're staying together as husband and wife, but I don't mind him going with men - after all, that's who he is.
We haven't worked out what to tell the children yet, but we'll work something out soon.
A, 33, Nottingham
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