Your guide to perfect oral sex

(198 ratings)
Woman licking her lips

Oral sex is hugely pleasurable for both partners - so make sure you're doing it right! Find out how to give and receive great oral sex with our guide.

Both men and women rank oral sex highly when it comes to what they enjoy most in the bedroom - and no wonder! Not only is oral sex great foreplay, but when done right it's also one of the most intimate and mindblowing sexual acts you and your partner can enjoy.

If you feel a bit squeamish about the whole thing (whether it's giving, or receiving), don't be. Oral sex is a natural part of a healthy sex life and we've got lots of advice to help you make the most of it.

If you're looking for a few pointers, need some help persuading your fella to be a bit more attentive or just want to check you're doing everything correctly, read on for our guide to oral sex.

Oral sex for men: How to give the perfect blow job

 Some women find giving a blow job a little nerve-wracking and uncomfortable, but the basics are pretty simple. Read our special guide for how to give the perfect blow job - and learn a few new techniques!  


Oral sex for women


If you want to get the most amazing oral sex and your man just isn't up to scratch, then it's time that you took the initiative and gave him a helping hand. Here are our top tips to getting the kind of treatment you deserve.

Tell him to slow down

Oral sex is great foreplay so get him to slow down and make the most of it! The mistake many men make is diving straight down to your genital area. If you tell him to build up slowly and kiss and lick other parts of your body first, then it will build anticipation and excitement. Point him in the direction of other parts of your body you enjoy being touched, such as your nipples, inner thighs, back, neck... whatever floats your boat.

Change your position

He doesn't have to be kneeling between your legs to get the best results. One famous method of cunnilingus is called the Kivin method and involves the man kneeling at right angles to your body and with his head lying on your thigh.

Alternatively, why not get your man to lie down on the bed and you climb on top of him facing a wall, so you have something to hold onto/lean on. This means you can control the pressure, pull away if it's too much or get closer if you want it harder. 

Lick his hand

Most men don't know the best way to use their tongue on you, so why not show him? Get hold of his hand and use your own tongue on his palm.

He'll probably be surprised to see you use the flat of your tongue rather than the tip, which most men use and also how slowly you move it.

Direct him

If he's in a position to be able to hear you, then make sure you tell your man what you want. Use clear, simple instructions like, 'slower', 'harder', 'faster'.

Remember, though, he's likely to not be able to hear you very well, so the way your body moves is even more important. Grind into him if you want to feel him harder or move away if it's happening too quickly or is too rough.

Continued below...

Flick him the V

If he's not really licking you in the right place, make a V sign with your fingers and show him where he should be putting his tongue. Position your fingers and get him to lick between them.



Your rating

Average rating

  • 4
(198 ratings)

Your comments


wow 9 years ago


I have to agree with you on the arousal before "shoving it into her face". I am a woman who hated oral sex, even done to me, because my 1st husband was a pig. It never felt right, demanding, and no satisfaction. Since then, I have had a partner for 3 yrs who as he says "took his time", and wow, he did. I felt comfortable, excited, and even began to go down on him, and enjoyed it. Now, i am about to get married (some one else) and he also takes his time, and I even suck his balls. He "leaks" a little, and that is OK, because it gives me time to get used to his taste, as I am getting used to mine. After we have intercourse, and even before, we have oral sex, then kiss, then intercourse, and well, it all comes together in many ways. I promised him that on our wedding night, actually whispered to him....that I will swallow him. and this is not said lightly. I am ready to do so, out of love, arousal, and want to do so, not because I am forced to. I have a gag reflex, so building up to this is a must. In time,I have enjoyed what my unselfish lover and now my soon-to-be husband (2 diff. men) have given me...The freedom to enjoy oral sex as it is meant to be, open, honestly, without force, and it has brought out a woman in me I NEVER thought was possible. Take your time, explore, be honest to yourself in what you want, and it is best enjoyed with a lover you can trust.

Fred Mancha

Hi I'm Fred. I have so far found Dr Abby very helpful and even though he's always busy he still respond to all my messages! I have recently ask for help from Dr Abby about my whole life and my wife concerning getting her back which should be casted for me soon! he try to give me as much help and assistance with your concerns and inform you of the right options to take! Dr Abby spells is also reasonable in price some places charge hundreds if not thousands of ponds or dollars, he have good ethics and his spells are affordable not just for the rich.. I would highly recommend him! I did feel drawn to him when searching for a spell caster, which seemed to ease my decision to turn to him for help! You can contact him on sacredspiralgoddesstemple @ gmail . com Sent from my MetroPCS 4G Wireless Phone


I love oral sex ,I always please the lady first ,I can and do it for as long as it takes ,I like to make the lady climax loads of times ,and I'm good I never fail to make them cum ,plus I like the taste of girls cum ,I adore it and so do they . I can't get enough of it ,so I don't understand men who don't do it or some ladies say he only gives little licks then stops ,but he wants you to take him down ,very selfish some men . So if any ladies who love it being done to them ,and hubby or boyfriend won't do it ,then email me ,I'm a mature healthy sexy attractive male ,I'll take you to another planet . . Paul




hes a looser please move around on him,alot of men are turning out to be selfish lovers a man should pleasure u first than u turn him out,or don't stick his penis in your mouth,tell him to keep it pushing and find a real man,real men love to please their woman

Rebeca Kasak

Blow jobs and oral sex should be fun so if you want to spice it up try playing with temperature and sensations ;)

Billie Parsons

Oral sex is the greatest way to stimulate a man or a woman into having an enjoyable sexual interlude. Unless it is a quickie knee trembler interlude round the back of the pub, I always spend a long time giving head to my partners, whether men or women, to build up the desire before ending up with a wonderful sex with whoever it is.

Cheryl House-wife Mcgowan

i hope you kicked him to the kerb!! :D


I think that blow jobs are the most important thing when it comes to keeping a guy. seriously! ive just read jacks blowjob lessons and i my husband fell in love with me like that again


who didnt love it ? :)


yes you are right but it is important.and without going down of a boy oral can be done for my ideas. it is not difficult.cunnilingus and oral are very important for a relationship. thus for gag you can do it slowly, saxo is not all thing for a man.slowly and correctly eat a penis is very exciting for men. finalyy, 69 positions can be hot to couples


LUV IT !!!!!!!!


Experimenting with sex positions and having oral sex is supposed to be a way of finding out what is comfortable for the both of you - eventually couples go on to find a few particular positions they like and like to carry them out more than others. Giving oral sex is supposed to be about finding out what works for BOTH of you and not just him. However if he does feel the need for it then you have to ask yourself if it is worth the effort before you do it as opposed to afterwards when you feel used. The best way to perform oral sex is to allow him to sexually arouse you first to the point of you getting you into mod of it. He cant simply shove it down your throat. you have to be in the mood to have it done to you. What I do as a guy is wrap my body around my wife and let her give me oral sex whilst at the same time my hands work on her own genatalia - she gets sexually aroused enough to do what she is doing. It took time for me to figure that this is better than trying to shove it in her face without her wanting to - this is simply because the world has placed a strain on sexual relationships - we dont want to be called boring do we!


i don't like to give oral on a man because i feel uncomfortable doing it and i usually start to gag whilst i am doing it.i have never kept doing it until the man came,but,just because i don't like giving oral on a man to the end result doesn't mean i am boring cow in bed.i love a variety of positions in bed and around my home and even outside and experimenting with different things i.e handcuffs drives me crazy when people say that just because either you don't do oral or don't like doing it that you are a boring cow/git.i am most certainly not reserved with the right guy during sex.there are other oral stuff you can do without going down on a guy/gal.




Ask him why he doesn't want to lick you, and ask him also if he likes when you give him a blow job... It's the simplest way to know it!!! Good luck!!!


It Sounds As Though He's Just Using You Darlinnn'! x


how is it possible to buy a book showing the methods of making love.

davine mitchell

my boyfriend never have oral sex with my i love giving it to him he just lie there and enjoyed it but i really do wish that he woud just make me freel the passion i dont even know if he enjoyed it cause he never say that it feels good nor make a sound that he do,,all the time i have to go down on him just for him to have sex with me.if i dont give him a blow job he dont have sex.

comments powered by Disqus

FREE Newsletter