Would you take a ‘divorce selfie’ with your ex?

Have you heard of a divorce selfie? This is the social media trend that’s been gathering pace over the last few years and helping newly-divorced couples heal their relationship wounds.

It might seem a little odd to look so happy about finalising your divorce, especially in the presence of the person you’re divorcing, but these selfies are taking Instagram by storm after former couples wanted to put on a shared brave face to friends and family.

The trend was picked up a few years ago when a Canadian couple, Shannon and Chris Neuman, hit headlines after snapping themselves looking pretty chirpy outside the court house where they’d just finalised their divorce.

But although it sounds a little sombre, the intention is actually surprisingly positive, with more and more couples seeing this as a way of giving their relationship a respectful end.

Instagram user Sara Olsen shared a snap of her and her ex-husband, whom she was with for 25 years and shares two children with.

She started her post by explaining the nature of the selfie, writing, ‘We went to court and got divorced today, and then went out for a beer and a selfie. Totally normal, right? Seems appropriate because nothing we’ve ever done is normal.’

Continuing her caption, the mum-of-two thanked her ex for ‘making this day, and so many other days, easier’ and reflecting, ‘instead of being disappointed that our choice to be together didn’t last forever, we choose to accept that sometimes good things fall irreparably apart, to be thankful for the adventures we had, to look forward to the new and exciting ways we will grow as individuals and in other relationships, and to commit to a lifelong friendship and coparenting partnership’.

We went to court and got divorced today, and then went out for a beer and a selfie. Totally normal, right? Seems appropriate because nothing we've ever done is normal. I'm grateful to this guy for 25 sometimes good, sometimes not-so-good, years together. We raised each other from adolescence to adulthood and then made two beautiful children we love like crazycakes. Instead of being disappointed that our choice to be together didn't last forever, we choose to accept that sometimes good things fall irreparably apart, to be thankful for the adventures we had, to look forward to the new and exciting ways we will grow as individuals and in other relationships, and to commit to a lifelong friendship and coparenting partnership– not just because it's good for our little ones, but because it's also good for us. KB, thanks for making this day, and so many other days, easier. You will always be my family. "Your heart and my heart are very, very old friends." (Rumi) #divorceselfie

A post shared by Sara Olsen (@emilysaraolsen) on

Similarly, Instagram user Summer Chiltern posted a divorce selfie with her ex husband, writing, ‘We still have a son to raise, and we will respect and support/help each other in the meantime. Every divorce should be like this one.’

https://www.instagram.com/p/_aDNo2MEtN/

These divorce selfies seem to be encouraging ex partners to attempt more amicable break-ups, with the comments on images tagged #DivorceSelfie being overwhelmingly positive.

One commenter wrote on Summer’s post, ‘This is beautiful. In the very early stages of this, and this is our goal, however with 3 kids, so scared of what may come. I only can hope it’s as nice as this!!’

Keith Hinson received praise when he shared an image of himself and his ex wife smiling for the camera. Captioning his photo he said, ‘We are officially un-married. Here’s to the most friendly, respectful, and loving split imaginable. We smile not because it’s over, but because it happened. #divorceselfie’

Social media users flooded Keith’s post with messages of admiration with one person saying, ‘This is the sweetest. You may not want to be together, but you both still respect and love one another – so refreshing!!’ and another agreeing, ‘Just wanted to say it’s really admirable that you can do this with so much respect for each other. Best wishes to you both for the future.’

Another divorcee, known on Instagram as blacktuesday74, shared an image of her and her ex husband saying ‘cheers to the rest of our lives apart’, giving a thumbs up to the camera.

Her post also received positive comments, with one person remarking on this new trend, ‘divorce is usually a bad/negative/conflicting occasion in a person’s life. I think this trend really shows that it’s not necessarily always a bad thing to do. Sometimes divorce can be a happy stepping stone rather than a depressing one.’

Would you take a divorce selfie with your ex? Tell us your thoughts in the comment box.