When it comes to life, marriage and children, arguments can be the glue holding a bad day together – but a recent study has found there’s one question to ask that will relieve tension in an instant.
A recent study by psychologist Alex Huynh claims that by asking just one simple question, you and your partner can get back to happier times.
The study, published by Social Psychological and Personality Science asked half of the participants to think about a recent clash in their relationship – like loading the dishwasher – and to focus on how they feel about it in the present.
Interestingly, Alex and his team asked the other half to think of the conflict in the context of the future.
Those who were asked’ ‘How will I feel in one year about this current conflict in my relationship?’ tended to work towards solving the spat than those he told to focus on the present.
The participants who thought about the future would also seem to place less blame on their partner, going for forgiveness instead.
Those who viewed the conflict in terms of their present emotions tended to think about their relationship more negatively than the other half.
Alex said: ‘When romantic partners argue over things like finances, jealousy, or other interpersonal issues, they tend to employ their current feelings as fuel for a heated argument.’
‘By envisioning their relationship in the future, people can shift the focus away from their current feelings and mitigate conflicts.’
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So, next time you find yourself in a heated spat about what to watch on the TV next, stop and ask yourself ‘how will I feel about this argument in the future?’ before continuing. Hopefully this will diffuse the situation and you’ll be watching EastEnders in no time!
What do you think? Will this work next time you argue over whose turn it is to take the bins out? Let us know in the comment box below.