Four years after giving birth, Adele has admitted that she suffered with severe postnatal depression after welcoming her son.
Speaking in an interview with Vanity Fair, Adele opened up about the difficulties she went through following the birth of son Angelo, and how the experience has left her too scared to have another baby.
The songstress is no stranger to exposing her feelings to the world through her music, but it’s four years after becoming a mother that Adele has spoken out about what she really went through.
The star revealed that she’s susceptible to depressive thoughts and has a history of battling the illness, ‘I have a very dark side. I’m very available to depression. I can slip in and out of it quite easily.
‘It started when my grandad died, when I was about 10, and while I never had a suicidal thought, I have been in therapy, lots.
‘But I haven’t had that feeling since I had my son and snapped out of my postpartum depression’ she added.
When asked if she plans to have another baby, Adele said she didn’t think so, explaining: ‘I’m too scared. I had really bad postpartum depression after I had my son, and it frightened me… I didn’t talk to anyone about it. I was very reluctant.’
Describing the symptoms she experienced, Adele continued: ‘My knowledge of postpartum… or post-natal, as we call it in England is that you don’t want to be with your child; you’re worried you might hurt your child; you’re worried you weren’t doing a good job.’
‘But I was obsessed with my child. I felt very inadequate; I felt like I’d made the worst decision of my life. It can come in many different forms.’
It was only after her boyfriend of five years and father of her child Simon pushed her to speak to friends about how she was feeling that Adele was able to start talking about it.
‘One day I said to a friend, “I f***in’ hate this,” and she just burst into tears and said, “I f***in’ hate this, too.’
Eventually the 28 year old found her own way to deal with it, and decided to take some time for herself, explaining, ‘Eventually I just said, I’m going to give myself an afternoon a week, just to do whatever the f**k I want without my baby.’